The good, the bad, the ugly Ozarks

I've said it before, I'll say it again - people are NOT
the same everywhere. Yes it's true a lot depends on your
atttitude going in, but not everything depends on your
attitude. I've lived in five different states in 3 different
regions. My favorite is the southwest, followed by the west.

The Ozarks are no exception with the good and with the bad.
A few things that surprised me but I should have known, duh.

*The Ozarks locals are an influx of both southern and midwestern
people. So basically you have the generosity and warmth of the
south, along with the snarkiness of the midwest. The 'bad'
aspect of the south applies here - the people are sweet to your
face but will talk about you the moment your back is turned.
The 'good' aspect of the south is here too - they may be down
to their last twenty dollars, but if you are in need they'll
gladly give you $18 of it. The midwestern influence comes in
with the distrust and lying to impress.

*Branson Missouri has a high crime rate. No it isn't reported
on any news source, unless the story goes national. Talk to
anyone living there and you'll find most crimes are kept out
of the media for fear of scaring off tourists.

*Missouri is supposedly a right to work state. This is being
misinterpreted by employers everywhere in the Ozarks as meaning
'we can treat our employees however we feel like it cuz we
can fire them for whatever reason and get away with it.' No
sh** I've seen it many many times. What they are failing to
realize is that they are held to the same laws as employers
anywhere are, and many times what they are doing is downright
illegal. Most employees do not realize this at all. Amazing
the discrimination, harrassment, bullying, etc.

*The simple laid back, not telling you what to do aspect that is
the Ozarks is very welcomed by me. Aside from some Bible thumpers
who get a bit carried away, for the most part it's a mind your
own business area. Yet there are many charities and volunteers
should one be in need.

*I think it is becoming more of the way of the country, and not
a localized issue, but it seems like there are more whiners and
no do something about it type of people here. Many whine, complain,
bitch and moan..whoa is me, whoa is the town, whoa is this and
that, but when it comes time to take action they hide.

*Never seen such an area so afraid of change either. Is that
good or bad? I can predict how an event will go every year,
just by going to the very first one. Absolutely nothing changes.
Is this for security maybe? Interesting observation however.

Would I do it again, move to the Ozarks? I never really cared
where I lived, although I do miss the southwest where I lived
the longest. I'm happy here, I'd be happy almost anywhere and
have never really had an issue with anyone locally. I guess
I would!

The Three S's

We discuss the concept of the Three S's often at our house.
I am reminded of it the past couple of days reading a NM forum.
It seems someone in NM (not sure where) shot and killed
a rattlesnake on his way to their henhouse. A 43 inch, 6 rattler.
This person has been given tons of grief for killing the snake
instead of relocating it.
Uhm.
(First off, the image of me trying to bag a rattler to relocate
it is just funnier than I ever could imagine. My odds of getting
bitten are astronomical. Also relocate it where? To the
neighbor's house? Oh they'll love you forever!!).

It is illegal to kill a wild animal (deer, bear, mountain lion,
elk, etc.) in NM unless you have the proper permit at hunting
season. There is no law against killing a rattler. At one
time I had a dead deer on our property. All NM deer belong
to the Game and Fish Department. They are supposed to investigate
any death (even natural causes). A bloody waste of taxpayer's
money at it's best. Meanwhile I had this dead deer - a deer that
would attract bear and goodness only knew what else. I called
Game and Fish. One warden lived just a couple of miles from
my house. "They'll be there shortly." They didn't show.
Called again. Same thing. Again. Same thing. I'm still
waiting for them to show to get the dead deer 14 years later!
After a day I called the poor dog warden. We lived in the
county but due to the extraterritorial zone he could come
2 miles outside the city limits to do something. He came
within five minutes and removed the deer.

I mentioned this story a few days later to the owner of the
local radio station, who was a neighbor. He looked at me
and replied, "Molly it's time you learned about the 3 S's."
"The 3 S's?"
"Game and Fish is a total waste. They don't want to do
anything. Plus they have the law on their side so we can't
do anything. The 3 S's stand for:

Shoot
Shovel
and
Shut Up."

I've never forgotten that. And I would have no problem
killing a rattler close to my house, my kid, or my animals.
While we do not have a deer, bear, or mountain lion problem
here in Missouri, there are those that have problems
with squirrels, and they employ the 3 S's! For the
record I do kill spiders and bugs, with no remorse :)
My son's cat takes care of the overpopulation of squirrels
and rabbits and rodents. As far as if I have ever killed
a rattler or any other poisonous snake, I'll plead the 3 S's :)

Bartering in the Ozarks

The tree in the photo losing branches in January's
ice storm is dead. It died last fall. It is
leaning heavily towards the road and not the
house (thank goodness). We had plans to remove
it ourselves. Tonite a very nice young man
stopped by. He works for a tree service and
wanted to remove it for us. So me, knowing
nothing about trees, called my other half out.
Hubby goes out there and asks him how much.
The guy says for $400 he could cut down the tree,
chop it up, haul it away, poof gone. Tree no
more. Hey that sounded reasonable to me, I
thought it would have been more than that
actually! But hubby laughed at him. Said
"For $400 I'll go cut down trees." The guy
immediately dropped his price to $200 :-0
Hubby pressed on. The guy went to $150, but
no cutting up or hauling away at that price.
We got the name and number of the tree service
and will probably have them do the work for
$200. Just as soon as we make sure they are
insured, as the guy himself is the one that
climbs the trees to cut them limb by limb down.
Soon no more dead tree or thinking about
it every time there is a nasty storm! :)

Weather

Wokay.

So yesterday they had been predicting nasty

storms for us. The NWS had us under a moderate

risk, as well as the entire state of Missouri, about

half of Oklahoma, and almost all of Illinois.

So in the garden I covered up the precious plants

I wanted to save with buckets. In the evening

you could see the squall line moving in - weatherman

stated that once it formed a big squall the big

threats were over. At ten pm weatherman stated

that a second line of storms formed, thus weakening

the nasty line, and the big threat was no more. It

was stated that the strongest wind gust recorded

was 30mph and very small hail reported. Ah. I

went to bed.

At 12:15 the storm sirens blaring in the town got

me up. I uttered a four letter word, put on the

slippers, and headed for a television. 5 counties

(including us) were under a tornado warning.

So.

As I sat there staring at an infomercial and waiting

for the warning to expire my mind wandered. I

decided I was getting mighty tired of these types

of storms and wanted to move. But I wanted to move

to an area where the weather was tamer. But where?

So my mind pondered - the upper midwest is out,

too many problems. New England, uhm, no. California

too liberal for my tastes. I have turned into a whiny

butt with cold weather and snow so that let a few

places out. Not into hurricanes, wildfires, earthquakes,

rude people and high taxes so that nixes a few more

states. I finally decided before heading back

to bed around 2am that I needed an

uninhabited island somewhere. I will write that on

my Christmas list to Santa.

Ah spring

It's springtime and I'm caught up! GO me!!

Finished planting today - that's it except for the

pumpkin planting in June. Now to wait for

everything to come up, grow, and produce.

Show me what?

Have lived in rural southern Missouri
for five years now. Have learned a few
things so thought I'd share in case
you are thinking of visiting/moving here.

*Weather - Storms here are unlike anything
I've seen before - so intense! Talk about
rock and roll! Keep an eye on the weather and
have a plan in place in any type of situation.
Those sirens you hear? Those are tornado
warning sirens (honest we didn't know this at
first). Get to shelter! Ice storms? Be prepared
for power outages and damage. Wind? Hail?
Snow? Black ice? Heat and humidity? Oh
yeah did we forget to mention this stuff to ya?
Meteorologists are awesome here, keeping you
abreast of the situation as much as they can.
Pay attention to them. Most lives are lost from
someone not heeding the warnings.
*You MUST have a garden if you live here. I think
it's a law (snicker). The garden can be as big or
as little as you want it to be. You can plant whatever
you want.
*Go to at least ONE farm show. You know, to blend in
with the locals. Act like you know what the person is
talking about - whether it be bulls or tractors or whatever.
*99.99999% of small town Missouri is conservative. They
are NRA members and they do own firearms. Don't mess
with them or try to tell them what to do.
*This is the Bible Belt. Baptist of many variations is the
most popular religion by far. A big goal of their's is to
try to get you to attend their church. Be honest, up front
and polite about your views on this and you won't have
many problems. They mean well. If they want to pray for
your soul because you don't belong to an organized church,
just thank them and let them. You can use all the prayers
anyway and you know it!
*Get used to simple food. Home grown veggies, simple meats
and dishes. Even the mexican food is usually not very spicy
(with the exception of El Imperial in Cabool). Don't expect
fancy dishes as they don't know how to cook it anyway.
*You must fish and hunt. Hunting is not the same, it consists
of baiting the deer with food filled deer stands, then waiting
for them to show up before picking them off :) The deer here
are those cute little white tail fellas too, not the big mule deer.
With fishing, it's pretty hard to not catch anything, but it
doesn't matter if you don't. Just go out for a few hours at some
ungodly early morning hour and bait a hook.
*If it's hot you go to the river. And usually drink. Especially on
Saturdays.
*Be friendly and get to know everyone. They won't bite. And
if you ever need anything they will be the first to jump. One time
I was negotiating with a guy over what he wanted to charge me
to mow my lawn. I was hard pressing him to lower his price. Before
I was done he was going to mow it for free. NO I didn't let him.
*It's okay to be different - just don't go around trying to change everyone.
*If they make a mistake on your bill and it's in their
favor, don't assume they did it on purpose.
*Housing standards and general living are not the same as other
places I've lived. There are no building codes in the county for
example. So it's always buyer beware. And people here do not
put an emphasis on material possessions as much as people in
other parts of the country do.